Saturday 29 November 2014

Controlling Anger


Anger is an emotion that can destroy us if we don not take care to control it. People experience varying degrees of anger. Some of us are “short tempered,” which means that we get angry at the flimsiest of excuses and show irritation and disgust. Display and expression of emotions sometimes results in disastrous consequences, which may result in such people ending on the other side of the law. Some people are good at controlling their emotions and do not show their annoyance and displeasure. Instead they try to reason out with themselves or with others and try to arrive at constructive solutions to problems that were the cause of their displeasure or annoyance.

Anger can cause serious consequences like separation of wedded couples, rebellion by children, suicides by the affected people and so on. Violence resulting from anger can take devastating forms. You must have heard of “road rage” due to which drivers sometimes cause accidents that result in death.

Controlling anger is more easily said than done. Meditation, Relaxation and the like are some of the methods advocated to control anger. These aids allow us to keep our minds free and relaxed and make us concentrate on the better things of life.

Let me share a simple thought with you. Whenever you are provoked why don’t you just close your eyes for a short time and think of how you should react before actually doing so? Think of what made the other person say what provokes you. After all he or she also has a reason. Unless, of course, he or she is trying to deliberately provoke you because of dislike or jealousy. In such cases also showing a temper would be doing what the person wants you to do. Deny him or her the pleasure and smile at him and then say the right thing under the circumstances.

There are many examples that we can emulate though we can not be like them. Gandhiji said that if you are slapped, don’t show your anger, but show the other cheek. This is a bit unrealistic in today’s world, but the lesson we should draw is that no constructive result is possible by stoking the fire. We should try to douse the fire.